SMART REHABILITATION

SMART REHABILITATION

 

CLICK THOUGHTOON!

    ---We think we made a viable case for NOT being DEPRIVED of the necessities of life – being valued, being appreciated, cared for, loved, etc. We know that people do far better in life when they get these needs met. When they are deprived of these fundamental human needs they end up being DEPRAVED (negative) in some way. We assume the physiological needs of food, clothing and shelter are being taken care of.

---When people feel depraved and negative inside, they try to change that feeling. They deal with this situation by involving themselves in something that serves to ease the distress that they are feeling. The only thing that makes a difference and will make things right is something that creates the love and appreciation, being valued, etc., that is needed. Only these things will serve to make the pain better...in the long run. If he/she hits on things that are needed, than a positive boost will be experienced. If he/she heads toward things that increases self-acceptance...than those things will keep him/her on track.

---If what is done runs away from facing the self then the negatives will be experienced. The negatives come into play when one runs from facing himself. He is now NOT getting his needs met.  The ADDICTION is being born at this point. It will be stopped when he/she faces him/herself. He will identify the need and he will meet it. We wish to rehabilitate the whole-person and not just the half-hearted, band aid on cancer rehab that we have been seeing. To rehab the whole person, we should increase his/her self-esteem, his/her self worth, etc. We have to help him/her find a good reason to say NO...and NOT become re-addicted. He/she has to be convinced that there is a good enough reason to say NO...so, he/she has NO need to run. It seems that people have to realize it is worth staying sober. It is better that they are NOT always under the influence.

---Facing up to the fact that I have one hand was the same thing for me. Believe me...if I could face things I didn't like about myself, you can do it TOO. As I said, ''it isn't necessarily going to be easy, but it is possible.'' And, it is well-worth it.

---However, if an emptiness is there, then we still have a problem. There is something NOT being faced. He or she will feel a hole within that still needs to be filled. As we said, this emptiness can only be filled by the right stuff. The correct stuff that is necessary would be whatever makes him/her fulfilled for a long period. It's important to be honest…otherwise the emptiness is still there and needs to be filled. For me it was my left-hand, but for someone else it, probably, is something else. What I did realize is that we all seem to have a negative attitude about something about ourselves that we are NOT cool with. Acceptance in this area would NOT be a bad thing and would open the door for getting the needs met.

CLICK THOUGHTOONs!

 ---When we are DEPRIVED of things that we need…that’s when the heartaches begin. We spend much of our time trying to do what is necessary to get these needs met. The more DEPRIVED we are is reflected in how DEPRAVED (NEGATIVE) we are feeling and acting. What I needed existed on the other side of the door. It became the Door of HONESTY. When I told others how I felt about my hand, etc., that is when I began filling in the emptiness about my own situation. I stopped DEPRIVING myself with this newly found honesty about the things that were real in my life and how I really felt. I began to accept myself allowing myself to experience many, more of the good things of life. To be loved, cared for, appreciated, valued, etc. As I said, if I can do it, you can do it.

---Anytime one is not being honest about himself and NOT learning to accept him or herself will still leave him/herself wanting and unfulfilled (DEPRIVED and EMPTY.) He/she will find that he will be making decisions that attempt to create situations that will try to get those needs met in order to feel fulfilled.

---SMART REHABILITATION happens when the patient   embodies the understanding that those experiences that he or she is feeling - valued, appreciated, loved, cared for, etc...are real. He or she is convinced that these NOW exist for him or her as they never did before. Things are different now. They are very real and this is now the way it is.  A complete 180 degree turn is NOT uncommon, eventually.

---SMART REHABILITATION works on helping the patient learn new techniques to feel more valued and appreciated. The patient is taught ways to make better decisions. The patient is encouraged to stand on his own. He or she is given new tools that help to bring clarity to his vision and see things clearly to be able to better negotiate his way through life. He is now assured enough so he/she can rely on him/herself to get what he/she needs. He now has the kind of tools to live a very satisfying non-addicted life. The sky really is the limit. Any limits have always been imposed by him or herself. Mediocrity is always a choice if that’s what is wanted. BUT, now It is NO LONGER something you’re required to settle for. Be Well.

WHEN THINGS ARE RIGHT...THE PATIENT FEELS WHOLE WITHOUT HIS ADDICTION. HE or SHE LEARNS THAT IT IS POSSIBLE TO ENJOY LIFE WITHOUT THE ADDICTION!

WHEN THE NEEDS OF THE PATIENT ARE MET, THEN HE DOES MUCH BETTER!



---This a draft. I reserve the right to make changes as I see fitting.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

CLICK THOUGHTOON!

KHAN ACADEMY - PSYCHOLOGICAL APPROACH

KHAN ACADEMY

---This website contains different videos in the field of fundamental psychology. It may be interesting to many people. It gives a pretty good overview of many of the things that we have been talking about.

SITUATIONAL APPROACH

KINDNESS IS ALWAYs GOOD!

CLICK THOUGHTOON!

BE AT HOME WITH YOURSELF!

MASLOW-TYPE THINKING on

HOMELESS vs HOUSELESS

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---I think a distinction has to be made of the two. A ‘’house’’ is a shelter, a structure…built by the hands. A heart builds a ‘’home.’’ A HOME is denoted by that warm, fuzzy, comfortable feeling you get where your significant others have let you know that they understand you...BUT/AND, accept you anyway. The place where you feel wanted, cared for and fulfilled. There is an UNCONDITIONAL feeling going on. The kind of situation that is safe and secure that can be BEST characterized by the knowing that the cake has just been frosted. 

---If you don’t have OR never have had OR don’t have a clue to what I’m referring to…than you have ALWAYs been HOMELESS from my perspective. I know that some relate to this. I know that some DO NOT. In my estimation, those terms have been confused for a very long time.

---What, also, makes things difficult at this point in time is the fact that those who are presently in charge of things have been deprived at an important developmental time in their own lives and a depravity (negativity) has taken over. Though, having much money, it shows that they have been deprived of what is needed for successful give + take relationships. It seems they were never valued properly. They were, also, never appreciated in the correct way. Love, support, security, etc., went haywire in some sense. Money was, probably, used in the place of what is really important! 

---Money and material goods will NEVER successfully replace the intangible benefits that love, etc., provides. Read below the relationship of DEPRIVED + DEPRAVED and see for yourself how it fits. The ''feeling that everything is alright with the world,'' would be replaced with the feeling you get when your significant other lets you know that he/she cares deeply for you or something of that nature.

---HANDs BUILD a HOUSE, but a HEART BUILDs a HOME. If that makes sense, then we are on the same page.

---Some people are more at home with themselves than others are. They bring their home with them everywhere they go. Some (many) do not.

---The more that one knows himself usually designates the degree to which someone is HOMELESS. If someone is truly comfortable with himself, he or she is usually considered to be at home with himself. If he or she is NOT comfortable with him or herself than ‘’Houston, we have a problem…OR, better yet – The HOMELESS PROBLEM.’’

---We somehow think that the solution to the HOMELESS PROBLEM is to build more houses. It is NOT. We have to put those in a HOMELESS MINDSET into a HOME MINDSET if they want to experience what it is like to be at HOME with who they are. In my estimation, the HOMELESS have to be taught what a HOME IS. Maybe, we ALL need a refresher course??

IT WOULD DO US ALL WELL TO MULL THIS OVER A BIT!

---Of course, in MASLOW's way of thinking we have one who has his/her needs met. One who is appreciated and valued. Loved and supported. He's made to feel secure and important and encouraged to achieve. These are essentials to living successfully. The GROWTH MINDSET comes to mind.

CLICK THOUGHTOON!

---When those needs are met, one easily reaches out and is very willing to support and respect others. He/She sees others as friends and allies...NOT enemies. EVERYONE BEING KIND WILL STILL MAKE THINGs BETTER!

HOW TO FEEL AT HOME WITH YOURSELF (CLICK LEFT)

RETURN TO - DEPRAVED and DEPRIVED!

RETURN TO

DEPRIVED and/or DEPRAVED

---Some folks have asked me to return to the ‘’WEST SIDE STORY’’ analogy. They feel that there is more to be said. The point to it all is the idea that for those DEPRIVED of love, support, being appreciated and valued…usually, end up living a life of DEPRAVITY. We, also, tried to define DEPRAVITY as acting negative in any sense at all, as it leads down the negative path. Those DEPRIVED of their basic human needs of love, support, being appreciated and/or valued tend to lead a life full of negativity. The RIGHT TOOL is DON'T DEPRIVE PEOPLE of this HUMAN NEED. It works much, much better for everyone...INCLUDING YOURSELF!

---It reminds me of my dad in the 1960's and 70's, warning about never trying to run the car on cheap gas. He said it will ping and eventually ruin the engine. Well, to save money, you use cheap gasoline. Lo and behold…he was right. You learn this lesson when the car is on the lift and the mechanic asks you if you have been using cheap gas? You have been caught with your hand in the cookie jar.

---ADDICTION works like this. We put the wrong items in the place that can only be filled by authentic things like love, being appreciated, etc. We run the engine on cheap gasoline that will eventually break down. We, also, find that it is NOT so easy to make the switch to a different budget. We are used to running our life with the extra money we were getting by buying the cheap gas. We have to now make ends meet on less money. We relied on cheap gas for so long. Now…it physically hurts the car to use it. The fact that it isn’t really the correct thing to use has revealed itself. The real need rears its’ head as it always does and you have found this out while using the cheap gas. At first it sort of worked, but NO MORE. It needs REAL GAS...NOT CHEAP GAS...to be satisfied. That area has been DEPRIVED for years. DEPRAVED actions (negativity) are the norm at this point. If the needs had been met right away, the path chosen for the life of the engine would have based on having the needs being met instead of the DEPRAVITY (negativity) based of that area never being properly dealt with.

---The quickest and the best way to get your needs met is to be honest with what you are doing. Using the wrong gasoline will always betray you eventually. To feel love, be loving. Be honest. Be proactive. Don’t just sit and complain how nobody cares about you. Spring for better gasoline as it will actually be the best buy in the long run. Be Honest and Be Well.

DEPRAVED and/or DEPRIVED!

DEPRIVED and/or DEPRAVED

---We may remember the famous line from the musical ‘’WEST SIDE STORY’’ – ‘’He Is DEPRAVED because He Is DEPRIVED!’’ I THINK these words are very true and have weighed heavily on our society for a longtime. And there seems NO LET UP IN SIGHT. It seems to only be getting worse. We can reverse it, but it is going to involve meeting the needs that are still are being deprived to this day.

---Through the work of Abraham Maslow and others we can see that there is a basic human need of being loved and supported. We know that every individual does better when he is appreciated and valued. Despite his/her ability. When these needs are in place and met, the individual usually returns this behavior with positive behavior of his own. He returns affection and security with security and affection.

---When people are deprived of their basic needs of being loved, appreciated and valued…they act in some negative anti-social way that resembles depravity. If your basic needs for love and appreciation are met you will tend to treat others warmly and well with a positive spirit. If you are deprived of these basic needs you are probably looking for an outlet for this negative energy.

CLICK THOUGHTOON!

---POSITIVE ENERGY IS SHARED BY THOSE WHO ARE NOT DEPRIVED of These basic human needs of love, support, being valued and appreciated.

---NEGATIVE ENERGY IS SHARED BY THOSE WHO ARE DEPRIVED of these basic human needs of love, support, being valued and appreciated.

THIS APPLIES TO YOU NO MATTER WHERE YOU MAY FALL IN THE HIERARCHY.

BEING KIND IS A GOOD WAY TO BEGIN REVERSING IT!

The ZEN VOLUNTEERs - Paul H.

Praise to the Zen Volunteers of Laguna Honda

Praise Laguna Honda for the opportunity

to speak with those astute people in three shifts throughout the day.

Praise the Volunteers for knowing a little bit about everything

to keep me stimulated.

Praise them for being aware of the self,

As it's the material

That concerns me the most.

Thanks for the consoling influence they have on all of us.

Thanks for their over-concern even when it’s unnecessary

and for knowing when to let it go.

I can’t imagine there being any other place—

outside of an academic setting—

where this would exist.

We all seem cut from the same jib

and that’s a very good place to be.

Many assorted peers, all part of the soup

I drink daily, 

That sustains me and keeps me always wanting more.

I count myself as one of the chosen few

Not in an addicted way

But as in one of great fortune.

They help me to find the sunshine

in a seemingly mundane setting.

In the sometimes chaotic gardens that can be here.

Paul Hendrickson

8/21/18

HOW TO MAKE PATIENTs HAPPY!

CLICK THOUGHTOON!

CAN BE JUST AS GREEN!

CLICK THOUGHTOON!

NEW STRATEGY: The RABBIT and the TURTLE!

NEW STRATEGY:

SLOWER than the Rabbit, but

FASTER than the Turtle!

---I think I found the trick to beat the turtle in the race. You have said it is NOT who crosses the finish line first, but the real winner is he/she who finds his/her own pace. I think if I go at a slower pace than the Rabbit and hence not tiring myself out while going faster than the Turtle to beat him/her! Eureka...I might win that race.

---My pace is somewhere between the rabbit and the turtle. In my younger days I did battle with those two many times. At times I must admit...the rabbit and turtle were unrecognizable. The rabbit could be a tiger and the turtle could be a rattler. My fear of my opponents could make the race and my pace a whole different animal. I didn't know where I was in the pace department. The good news is that I learned my lessons and NOW pick and choose better. I make more mature decisions. Things are less fear based and more in the realm of reality.

---I, finally, REDEFINED WINNING! I understand what is meant by, ''the winner is the one who finds his/her own pace.'' Be Well!

 RIVALRY: Sibling or Otherwise

---Many find themselves competing and comparing themselves to siblings and/or someone else who seemingly outdoes them at every turn. Him or her gets more notice for his abilities than you do. You discover that there exists a resentment toward this other person that exposes a jealousy you harbor toward him/her for the abilities he has.

---The real winning is NOT who crosses the finish line first. It comes to whomever finds his own pace that causes him/her to perform at his optimum.

CLICK THOUGHTOON!

---This calls into question the difference between BEING the best OR DOING your best. If the main concern is about being the best, you can see a more roller coaster ride is in store for your life. If your life is about doing your best, you can see how much, more consistent things will most likely be. Be Well.

OPEN LETTER TO MY BROTHER!

Hi Peter,

CLICK THOUGHTOON!

---Everyone in this hospital and I would say that everyone I met hitchhiking and everyone in general are doing exactly what you and I  have been doing in our own way. We and they are searching to have a better relationship with ourselves. Anyone who found something that they truly liked + enjoyed and were working at it, seemed to have a leg up on the rest. There are some, but NOT a whole lot of people that have found it (their passion) at a young age.

---I was in Charlotte, NC  (1981) saying to God (this is something I sometimes did back then,) if you grow my fingers, I'll build a Church for you. I had a real revelation at this time. ''Healing doesn't come in growing fingers or anything like that. It comes in accepting yourself as you are, so-called faults and all.'' This really changed things around for me. Instead trying to be different than who I am, BE WHO I AM. And, when push comes to shove...this is the best that I can be. MYSELF! And, that is okay! My understanding of who and what God is matured in a big way, also.

---I found that that is basically why people appear so screwed up at times. It is because people really don't know that they are good enough. They don't know that it's alright to be themselves. They end up competing and comparing themselves to each other to find this out. They really don't accept themselves as they are. They end up seeing if they measure up to their neighbor. They think that they need fingers (or whatever happens to be their hang up) to complete who they are. I didn't and they don't! (It is the thinking that these things are necessary,) that is the problem! When one loves and accepts oneself, one never thinks of harming others.

---And, for those who act like they think they are better than other people (superior,) they are just compensating for feelings of inferiority inside. This is basically the boat we are all in. Be Well!

MAHATMA GANDHI

VISION OF SELF ACTUALIZATION

INSPIRING

The PERFECT SEXUAL COUPLING WITHIN!

The COUPLING WITHIN

---All human beings have both the male and female within. The Yin and Yang if you will. When the two are aligned properly, (perfect sexual coupling within,) then the offspring of the coupling becomes purity + love itself. To be in this state one must be very honest + pure to begin with. It renews the you that you are, with the new you of the coupling. This coupling continues to renew the you that you are and occurs while one remains in this pure state. One in a certain sense…marries himself/herself. To put it a better way, MARRIES The SELF. It is truly a state of SELF-ACCEPTANCE. It's easier to perceive than to live out of. A state of constant eternal growth if one is able to stay in this pure state. (Very Tantric!)

A DRAFT…To Be CONTINUED!